My Nephews Will Have Dog Ears!
by Anora-the-Dreamer
Summary: Kagome wants to go to the prom, yet is dateless, Miroku and Sango are bound by glue, and Shippo's tail keeps getting stuck in things, fun stuff all around!
1. Chapter One

**My Nephews Will Have Ears!**

**Summary: **Kagome wants to go to the prom, yet is dateless, Miroku and Sango are bound by glue, Kouga is wandering around modern Japan, Ayame is stalking him, and Shippo's tail keeps getting stuck in things, fun stuff all around!

**Disclaimer: **Uh...I'm not even Japanese so how could I own InuYasha?

A/N- Okay, this fic is meant to be stupid and funny. None of this someone dies, or what's-Inuyasha-going to choose stuff. Not that those fics aren't food and all, just that sometimes you just like to torture the inu cast and laugh your head off in the process. That's all I've got to say. Oh, I went through all the trouble of writing this, so you go through the minimal trouble of reviewing. NOT a difficult concept.   
"Mom, preventing Naraku for taking over the Feudal Era and doing who-knows--what-else is just a tad bit more important than my prom" said Kagome, trying her best to talk her mom out of making her go to her prom, a tradition she regarded as something to be attended by people who weren't forever dashing around the Feudal Era with perverts, demons, and demon killers. What did she ever do to the world?

"Oh, nonsense, honey," said Mrs. Higurashi, unswayed by her daughter's please, both silent and otherwise, "It's your prom! You have to go!"

"No," said Kagome, practically non-existent temper slowly appearing, "I don't."

"It's your prom! You only get one, you know."

"Yes, I know. Thank god for small favors."

"You HAVE to go."

"Okay, mom. Let's say I was going (Which I'm NOT), who would I take and who would hunt for the Shikkon Jewel while I was here eating cheap cake and drinking punch?"

"What about your friends? The dark-haired one with the hole in his hand?"

At that Kagome had to laugh. "Miroku? Mom, he'd get arrested for sexual assault within two hours."

Mrs. Higurashi stood silent for a moment, a look of pondering on her face. "What about your other friend? The one with ears?"

"He has ears. Even if he did go, he'd slash anyone who insulted him to pieces."

Silence and pondering again. "He could wear a hat!" Kagome's mother declared cheerfully.

"Uh-huh," said Kagome doubtfully, "And who is going to convince him to do that?"

"You are!" said Mrs. Higurashi, getting happier and happier by the moment.

"How?"

"Bribery!"

"That STILL doesn't solve Shikkon Jewel issue."

"Oh, come on! One night without you won't kill them!"

"Actually, mom, it might do just that."

The whole inu gang was around a fire cooking Ramen at the urging of a certain hanyou that shall remain temporarily nameless. It was a very typical scene, Inuyasha devouring his food as though he hadn't eaten in weeks, finishing just in time to get in a fight with Kagome, Miroku was covered with red marks, Sango kept glaring at him, really quite heart-warming.

"Inuyasha?" asked Kagome, remembering she was supposed to be nice to him.

The hanyou glanced at her suspiciously, instantly disliking her sweet and innocent tone. What did she want from him? "Yeah?"

"Well...erm..."

"Get on with it, wench."

"At my world we have something called Senior Prom."

Inuyasha perked up instantly, "Is that a type of food?"

Kagome sighed. This was going to take a lot of work. "No, it's a social gathering..."

"Do what?"

She sighed again. Loudly. "A bunch of people dress up, stand in a room with music, eat, and dance. And sometimes if you like someone and then you ask them and then you stand, eat, and dance together. Got it?"

Inuyasha looked bored. "So what?"

"Well, it's really awkward most of the time if you don't bring someone."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, "So bring someone so you don't feel awkward." Honestly, how thick could you get?

"That's where you come in."

Inuyasha winced and looked at the nearest tree longingly. Why did she always have to bring him into all these sort of things? Couldn't she bring someone else? Like Ho-Ho or whatever. Oh, wait. He hated Ho-Ho and thought he ought to go burn in hell. Okay, what about Kouga? He was even worse. Deserved to be beaten by Sango having a bad day. He sat there for a full minute and thought. Why couldn't she go with her little brother? He was all right and would keep his hands off of her. However, when he voiced this option allowed Kagome started rolling on the ground laughing muttering something about Sota not being tall enough. Hmmm...that really didn't leave many options.

"Why would I do this?" he asked, while he didn't want her going with anyone else, he still wasn't entirely convinced. That era was outright creepy.

"Because you're around me all the time and would have to listen to me complain if you didn't?"

He gave her a look that said nice-try-but-no-way-in-hell-bitch.

Kagome sighed and surrendered to the inevitable, "We can stock up on ramen when we get there?"

He looked absolutely delighted and nodded before either of them knew what was happening.

Sango and Miroku watched from a distance, faintly amused, but would have likely been laughing their heads off had they known what a prom was.

A/N- Just what I need, another fic to update. Ah, well. Don't expect an update for about a month.


	2. The Evils Of Arts and Crafts

**My Nephews Will Have Dog Ears!**

**Chapter Two: The Evils of Arts And Crafts**

**Disclaimer: **I'm working on owning the Inuyasha characters, but Rumiko Takahashi doesn't respond well to bribes...

"Are you really going with InuYasha?" said Sota, barely able to contain himself.

"Yeah," said Kagome, "I'm just going to hope he doesn't kill anyone."

"This is AWESOME," said Sota. "What if you two actually start liking each other? Ooh, what if you get married? What if you have kids? That would be so awesome! My nephews would have dog ears!"

"Or," said Kagome, "We can just keep hoping he doesn't kill anyone." And with that cheerful comment she was down the well to retrieve her prom date.

"Iron Reaver, So-" started Inuyasha, hurling himself towards a car going at least thirty miles per hour, hat flying off he his head.

Kagome had a firm hold on his hand and was pulling him down bellowing, "It's not a demon! It's a car! They're everywhere! Say it with me, Ca-are."

"It's not a demon?" The hanyou looked disappointed.

"No," said Kagome giving the most innocent smile she could muster to the owner of the car who was staring at the guy with ears arguing with some girl. "Oh!" she said, facing the owner, "He...uh...doesn't get out much. He...just got out of a mental hospital!"

The guy just kept staring at her before driving off as fast as the car would go.

"Inuyasha, let's go into the house and get something to eat," said Kagome. Inuyasha grinned happily, picked up Kagome, and bounded off towards the house at full speed.

MEANWHILE AT THE HOUSE IN QUESTION

"So what's this stuff again?" said Sango, eyeing the white tube suspiciously.

Sota sighed and began to explain again. "It's called superglue (A/N- oh, what fun!), you can put bits of paper together and stuff with it. It's really fun!" He seemed quite happy and shoved glue, scissors and paper towards Sango, Miroku, Kirara and Shippo.

"What do we do with these little knives?" said Miroku, stabbing the carpet curiously with the scissors.

"No," said Sota, taking the scissors from a thoroughly bewildered monk. "You do this." He cut glued bits of paper together, and then proudly displayed his work to his pitifully small audience.

Understanding was beginning to show in their eyes and they began to mutilate the paper enthusiastically.

"What's this stuff called?" asked Miroku. This was his first visit to modern Japan, while doubtlessly interesting these people had some incredibly alarming rituals. Like the one in which they would stare at a shining colorful moving screen for hours. However, plenty of these things, chocolate for instance, were quite good. "Supper-glow?"

"Superglue," said Sango covered with a pile of little bits of paper.

"It won't give me any," said Miroku, squeezing the tube as he had seen Sota done, but he wasn't having much luck. What happened next was one horror after another. In slow motion, or at least it seemed as such to the occupants of the upstairs hallway, Miroku sat the tube down and pounded it with his staff.

"That might not," was all Sota got out before the horribly abused tube finally gave way and started spewing white goo everywhere. Shippo was drenched and started stumbling around trying to find something to wash all this stuff out of his tail and got in the direction of the bathroom.

"My eyes!" shrieked Sango, this stuff hurt like hell and she clawed at her eyes. "It got in my eyes! Get it out!" She too stumbled towards the bathroom grabbing for the whatcha-ma-callums, facets, that was it, and grabbed the doorknob instead.

Sango accidentally slammed the door instead of running water and Shippo's cries of "My tail! OW!" joined her own.

Miroku found Sango and dragged her in the direction of the sink, he was undamaged aside from the fact he had something that was much more permanent that hair gel all over his head. He whacked the facets until the shiny thing starting spouting clean water and shoved her head under it.

Sango, still thoroughly alarmed, was convinced she was drowning (though at least the glue was out of her eyes and they would remain red for hours). She whacked her unknown captor in the chest, heard a muffled grunt and ran towards the door.

"Sango!" yelled Miroku, "The stairs!" He ran after her and tried to hold her back, but...THUMP! Too late. Sango was at the bottom of the stairs and he was in the process of tumbling down them. THUMP! Hey, at least he had a little, if thoroughly pissed off, padding.

"The only way you can get this stuff off is to wash it before it dries!" said Sota, doing much better than anyone else in that group (he was behind Miroku at the time of the 'explosion'). "Get outside where I can hose everyone off!" Shippo and Kirara nodded and took off down the stairs, stepping on a groaning set of disgruntled people.

"Sota!" yelled Kagome as Inuyasha watched, laughing. "What the hell did you give them?" She them proceeded to hose all of them off, even getting the top half of Miroku and Sango.

Sango shoved the semi-conscious monk off of her, muttering "Hentai," even though she knew full well he couldn't help. The monk in question stood up and Sango glared at him, still blushing.

"Well," she demanded, "aren't you going to help me up?"

The monk offered her his left hand, his right started to turn black and purple. He pulled her up, and there they stood, soaking wet and indignant.

"You can let go of my hand now," she said, trying to tug her hand away from his.

"I wish I could," he said, pulling hard, unable to even pry his fingers away from her palm.

"Oh, no," she said trying to pry hid fingers away. "I want to change out of these cloths and I'm NOT doing it in front of you."

"You think I like this?" he said, trying to act innocent.

"Probably do lech," was Sango's sarcastic reply, "Probably do."

A/N-hehe, poor Sango and Miroku. Aw, well. I didn't think I'd be updating this for a while. I guess I proved myself wrong. Anywho REVIEW!


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